Changing hearts to change the world- A method for addressing hate politics you haven’t heard before
The virus of hate is alive and well. Words like, “parental rights”, “critical race theory” and “grooming” have taken center stage at every GOP rally. These topics founded on nothing more than fear and hate are not even real. Critical Race Theory is not taught in schools. Fear of grooming is a fiction derived by the right-wing to control and upset voters. Parental rights have not changed at all. Parents have always had rights, but by making people believe that “they have no rights”, or that their rights have been taken away by the “radical left”, GOP voters rally in fear and opposition against the imaginary boogeyman of their own creation.
This culture of fear and hate is not new or unique. Regimes have used these tactics since the beginning of time to control people. The result of this kind of thinking is also the same. It leads to a massive increase in violence every time. Part of the reason for this is that people fear that they need to protect themselves from the imagined enemy they have created, so they loosen gun laws and arm themselves so heavily that there are currently more guns than people in the United States. In fact, there are 393 million guns in America, but the overall number of households with guns has been declining. Currently, 3 in 10 Americans are gun owners. This means that those who own guns are buying more and more of them.
Fear is like a virus. When people allow fear to enter their psyche it grows exponentially. In fact, fear is a learned response to things that are unfamiliar. Fear causes obsession. We saw this during Covid lockdowns when toilet paper and hand sanitizer disappeared from the grocery store shelves. When people live in fear, they accumulate more and more, and they are never satisfied. Instead of toilet paper, the fearful are accumulating guns.
It is not uncommon for fearful people to attach themselves to narcissists so that they can feel the glow of safety emitted in their false confidence and outrageous accusations. The politician screams about the dreaded imagined problem and after eliciting a response from the hungry desperate crowd, offers a solution to the imagined problem. The lull of the narcissist is not unlike the adoration that an abused woman has for her abuser. She seeks to protect him from criticism at the cost of her own truth. We see this in politics today. The GOP rallies around its star, disregarding indictments in the presence of clear guilt, and outrageous acts of treason. Many of the same congressmen and women standing in defense of Trump today, cried and hid under seats trying to save their own lives from the angry mob that Trump created with his hate-filled speech and false accusations of a rigged election. Yet here they are, like abuse victims defending the abuser. Justifying his claims, rallying to his defense- even as they know that the next sucker punch will land squarely in their faces.
The abusive politician tells them to be afraid, and like abuse victims seeking protection, GOP voters run towards the protective light. Their fear controls them. They worry about a future where their whiteness is less significant or persuasive. As the United States becomes more black and brown, as the country becomes more gay, as women become more successful in the job market, and as the religious right becomes less relevant, the fear tactics will increase.
This is a certainty because people who live in fear will flock to the attention of those who lie to them with claims of false boogeymen. But we will continue to rise, and we cannot be slowed. We are not a people to be feared, we are the loving people of this country. We are women and men, we are black and white, we are Jewish and Muslim, we are binary and nonbinary, we love who we love and we make no apology for it.
We are the many faces of the United States of America.
Though you may be tempted to raise your fist in anger at the GOP voter, I encourage you to reach out your arms and embrace them instead.
Understand this, they fear what they do not know. They only have friends that are like them, white, straight, fearful, and angry. They only feel comfortable in the company of others like them. They are preparing for a fight because they have fed the monster of fear, more than they have fed the angel of love.
If we are to transform hearts, then we must represent love in the face of prejudice, anger, and hypocrisy. If we are to transform hearts, then we must soften the fearful heart with tenderness and unwarranted understanding.
This sounds like some kind of hippie philosophy. Perhaps you find it almost impossible to embrace it. Throughout history, this has been true. Mahatma Gandhi told us to “Be the light we wish to see in the world.”, Jesus Christ told us to “love our enemies”, Buddhist teachings remind us that we are to wash those we struggle to love in loving-kindness meditation.
Psychology and Sociology suggest the same approach. When the GOP advocate knows someone who is trans, they will not hate the trans community the same way. When they know someone who is black, they will think of black people differently, when they experience the love of a gay couple, they will know that the gay community is friendly. When they come to know us, they will find it harder to attack us.
In the words of Martin Luther King, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
So rather than feed cruelty, and debate endlessly, I will love. I will love as a form of rebellion.
I will choose to love you, even if you hate me. Reflected in my love you will see your broken self. I will not confront you directly, but I will force you to confront yourself in the presence of my love.